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"Titans" -Warriors of Virtue

Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

There's nothing wrong with your entries, Channe. You mentioned prose up there. I do seem to have a problem with staying in the script format, don't I? My dialogue's not too hot either, but I'm pretty good with action sequences.



------------------
"Draal gave Zathras list of things not to say.
This was one. No.... *tsk tsk*
No. Not good.
Not supposed to mention... "one", or... THE one.
Hmmmm.
You never heard that."
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

*yawn* It's no problem if you stay in the format you stay in. I guess what I meant was simply that if I were a little less tired, I'd be writing better sentences than that!
smile.gif


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The writer's life is not meant to be a happy one. We all accept that going in. -JMS
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

Oh, ignore me - I can get *really* self-critical when I want to! Just go on... write the story... ignore me...
smile.gif


------------------
The writer's life is not meant to be a happy one. We all accept that going in. -JMS
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

Ok, as promised. Been busy helping a family member move to a new place.

--

EXT. ISHNU - SHUTTLE

Mar strides over to where Langley is embroiled with Novakovich, fixing the comm system. She pauses behind her, throwing the POC to the ground. Langley slowly turns around.

LANGLEY
Makes you want to wash your mind out with soap, doesn't it?

MAR (disgusted)
What's your plan?

LANGLEY
We have to get Chenei out. Alive. As distasteful as that may seem. Same thing with Henderson.

MAR
And Kaheel?

LANGLEY
You know why he's here.

MAR
I'm not leaving him behind.

LANGLEY
We might have to. Daly, Keller, the others. If we want to get out alive.

MAR
Like hell.

Langley pauses, and sighs a bit.

LANGLEY
We need them as evidence. A trump card, if you will.

Mar looks over Langley, and tightens the hold on her gun.

MAR
I'm not here to win. I don't care about the evidence. Henderson's a good girl. I don't know Kaheel very well - but he's devoted. And like hell - like hell I'm going to leave Daly and Keller to die. Not after all they did for me.

LANGLEY (taken aback)
We may not have a choice.

MAR
What about your crew?

LANGLEY
You saw what was on that screen! This is bigger than either of us, Mar. What's your priority - two, three lives - or the lives of seventeen human colonies and Homeworld itself?

Mar, tortured, goes to answer, only to be interrupted by an energetic yell from Novakovich and the encouraging sound of machinery firing up.

NOVAKOVICH
It's up!

LANGLEY
Best thing I've heard all day. Patch me through to home office - red code.

Langley crouches by the machinery. Mar joins her, looking discomfited. After a brief fiddling, Novakovich nods. The Langley that speaks is not the Langley that just argued. Her voice is a lost little girl's, the voice of a commander thrust into a situation that has overcome her.

LANGLEY
This is - Emily Langley, CSS Shadows. Please come in. Please come in. We're -

CALLENEGRA (V.O.)
Langley. Thank God. This is Callenegra. Where are you located?

INT. ALIEN CITY - ROOM

Focus on the door. It slides open, and the Old Man enters. The shot opens to include the entire room. Seated in the center is the changed Henderson, her eyes closed, a hybrid Bodhisattva.

He crosses to her, bringing her the vial we've seen before, emptied of its contents. Kneeling before her, he ties it around her neck. Her eyes open. There's something black, something vile in them.

HENDERSON
(alien language)

OLD MAN
(alien language)

He stops, and rocks back on his heels. For a moment, a soft look passes through his eyes as he looks at her. A soft, regretful look.

OLD MAN
Are you ready?

HENDERSON
I've been ready for a hundred years.

This answer causes the Old Man to look down, to choke on something a little.

HENDERSON
You hate them.

OLD MAN
Is it that evident?

HENDERSON
How can you hate one that offers you this?

And she reaches up, a hand cupped. In the palm of her hand swirls energy, a ball of energy.

CLOSE on the Old Man's face as it turns from sadness to wonder, from pain into amazement.

------------------
The writer's life is not meant to be a happy one. We all accept that going in. -JMS

[This message has been edited by channe (edited December 18, 2001).]
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

*coughs*

Excuse me.
laugh.gif


------------------
Sheridan: Are you trying to cheer me up?
Ivanova: No sir, wouldn't dream of it.
Sheridan: Good, I hate being cheered up. It's depressing.
Ivanova: So in that case we're all going to die horrible, painful, lingering deaths.
Sheridan: Thank you, I feel so much better now.
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

Hello, faithful and loyal readers.

It has come to my attention after re-reading my last entry of Titans that, in actuality, I'm not going where I thought I was, and that that entry are so far off the plan I couldn't find them (b5 reference alert) with a hunting dog and an ouija board. So I deleted it.

Rewind your brain a tiny bit and you'll be fine.

Thank you for sticking around this long.

And where are my fellow writers?
smile.gif


------------------
The writer's life is not meant to be a happy one. We all accept that going in. -JMS

[This message has been edited by channe (edited December 25, 2001).]
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

Good! I had issues with it, myself.

I promise I'll try and finish up before I switch jobs and disappear (which is the same thing I told my employers).

------------------
"Draal gave Zathras list of things not to say.
This was one. No.... *tsk tsk*
No. Not good.
Not supposed to mention... "one", or... THE one.
Hmmmm.
You never heard that."
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

You should have seen the short story I just completed yesterday. I printed it out, read it, and threw it out, it was so bad.

mad.gif


Oh well. I guess when I'm on vacation, my brain goes too. The will is there, but the ability to put words together is weak.
laugh.gif


I guess it's good that only a few people here know my real name - when I become a famous novelist, somebody'll dredge out my last few entries and the entire literary world will laugh at me. *grin*

That said, I have some new ideas, but I have to wash the floor first, so... well, keep tuned.

------------------
The writer's life is not meant to be a happy one. We all accept that going in. -JMS

[This message has been edited by channe (edited December 26, 2001).]
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

INT. ISHNU CITY TUNNEL

Pitch black.

The dark is all encompassing; no motion can be detected by the human eye, but a scraping sound approaches from the left. As it comes closer, it is accompanied by the telltale sounds of exertion - grunting and labored breath.

Although we can't see her, ARI KELLER is making steady progress through the tunnel with Kaheel still beneath her. She has been pushing Kaheel along for close to forty minutes, but has no idea how far they have progressed. With her arms around him, she continues forward, propping her elbows, lifting her companion, and shoving a foot or two forward with her feet. His wounds were dressed once again but he had not yet regained consciousness. Since pointless action was better than no action at all, she started moving in search of a way out. Afraid to leave Kaheel, she chose to drag him along. It seemed a wise move thirty-nine minutes ago, maybe even thirty-nine and a half, but since then....

Lift. Shove. Rest. Lift. Shove. Rest.

She is sweating profusely and her muscles are aching terribly. Kaheel feels unnaturally cold, and she hopes her excess body heat is at least doing him some good. The blackness is monotonous and utterly discouraging. The walls to the tunnel are uncomfortably close, warm, and soft. They envelope their passengers is a snug embrace that leaves Keller feeling violated.

Lift. Shove. Rest. Lift. Shove. Rest.

KELLER
Ugh! Now I know what snake shit feels like!

She stops to rest again, disgusted, flopping on Kaheel so heavily, she worries that she'll drive him through the floor. But for a grunt, he remains silent.

KELLER
Kaheel? Are you with me yet? I could really use some help here. (sharply) KAHEEL!

Kaheel jerks and mutters feverishly in Calderan. Regretfully, Keller doesn't understand it. But from his gibberish, she does pick out a name:

Chellah.

Keller knew about Kaheel's wife and child. She could imagine the awful memories this place must be unleashing upon him, especially in his current state of delirium. They were literally inches apart from being face to face, and yet she still could not see him, but she could feel his anguish coming off in waves. She began to move forward again.

Lift. Shove. Rest. Lift. Shove. Rest

Keller wished she had been able to hear that last conversation in the cell, but that device... it had been horrible. She had felt her thoughts flying apart, her senses distorted. She had felt fear of losing herself - of becoming something else. Yet even through that nightmarish dementia, she had inferred some of what had happened. First, she had seen Kaheel fly into a murderous rage but then, just at the end, he seemed to be demanding something from the Vai in the cell. When it was clear, the Vai was dead, he had looked desperate, haunted.

What was it? Some information of great importance? And was it general in nature or was it more... personal?
Kaheel had saved her and she sought to repay the favor. She leans close to Kaheel and whispers in the general area of his ear.

KELLER
I'll do whatever I can to help. Just tell me how.
(pauses) What about Chellah?

Kaheel tenses beneath her and suddenly, even in the blackness, she can tell he is awake. His posture is somehow formal, despite the fact that he is lying beneath a sweaty woman. Keller thinks she liked it better when he was unconscious, and is glad she has the darkness to conceal her sense of embarrassment.

KAHEEL (thickly voiced)
Chellah, Keevon..... may be alive.

Kaheel's voice broke on that last word, but Keller couldn't tell whether it was from joy or sadness.

Keller was shocked. After fifteen years? What horrors had they seen?

Her thoughts are interrupted as an opening suddenly appears a mere hundred feet from their location. Keller squints against the meager light that enters the tunnel to see a large ungainly form entering directly in their path.

To be Continued:



------------------
"Draal gave Zathras list of things not to say.
This was one. No.... *tsk tsk*
No. Not good.
Not supposed to mention... "one", or... THE one.
Hmmmm.
You never heard that."
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

INT. ISHNU CITY TUNNEL

In the waning darkness of the tunnel, KAHEEL and ARI KELLER are motionless and breathless. A huge form has lumbered into the tunnel through an entrance very close by. It blocks out all light as it fills the empty space and Keller is temporarily blinded. Kaheel, for his part, can still make out the shape of the creature but he can't tell which way it is facing. Although his senses of hearing and smell were much keener than those of a human, his eyesight was only marginally better.

KELLER (in a whisper)
What's it doing?

KAHEEL (almost inaudibly)
shhh

The creature is shifting within the tunnel, apparently getting comfortable within the confining space. It issues low growls and gurgles that sound for all the world like a giant malevolent stomach. Suddenly all noise stops and the tunnel is deathly quiet.

KAHEEL (to himself)
If it comes this way....

Keller continues holding her breath. Damn, it's quiet in here! Suddenly, with a wave of peristaltic motion, the creature practically flies down the tube like a torpedo and disappears into the dark recesses of the tunnel. In its wake, a shaft of filtered light reappears. The opening was still there!

KELLER
Let's move!

Keller and Kaheel scrabble side by side toward their escape. Despite the closeness of the tunnel walls, they cover the distance quickly. They cautiously stay back from the opening until it begins to shrink before their eyes. Keller leaps forward and visually scans the room. Small space. Some semi-organic looking equipment. No Vai in sight.

KELLER (hurriedly)
I don't see any of them.

KAHEEL
Good. After you.

Keller emerges from the tunnel face first and quickly ducks behind one of the larger bio-machines in the room. From that location, they wouldn't be immediately spotted if something entered through...

Kaheel hadn't come out.

As the tunnel orifice closed to the size of a dinner plate, Keller could see Kaheel sitting calmly within. Just before it closed he inclined his head to her in what seemed like a respectful gesture of farewell.





------------------
"Draal gave Zathras list of things not to say.
This was one. No.... *tsk tsk*
No. Not good.
Not supposed to mention... "one", or... THE one.
Hmmmm.
You never heard that."
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

EXT. ISHNU - SHUTTLE - FOREST

Langley is crouched before the comm system. Novakovich, behind her, stays out of sight, moving to a secondary system. Mar is on the verge of bursting loose with something; but she keeps a tight-reined mouth, although it's obvious she'd love to let loose. All she can do is lean down, pick up the fallen POC, and stew.

Langley flips on the screen. Callenegra is in his mid-50's, Hispanic, distinguished, a man permenantly marked by a career in upper management.

LANGLEY
Sir, we're on Ishnu. We were attacked by something on-planet while conducting a rescue operation aboard the wreckage of Titans -

CALLENEGRA
Repeat, Langley. I'm losing you on this end. What?

LANGLEY
On Ishnu, sir! Titans is destroyed, Shadows is derelict, in orbit above Ishnu. There's no contact with either ship. Sir, I'm requesting reinforcements.

CALLENEGRA (shouts off-screen)
You lose this connection and you're fired!(pause)
Langley - we can't send another ship until we know what happened to the last two. What's down there? You're our eyes, Langley - we've lost the Titans crew. What's going on down there?

Mar tightens visibly. Her eyes bore into Langley's back.

LANGELY (pauses for a moment)
There's been no contact with the Titans crew. Fifteen confirmed dead on the ship. I don't know what's happened to the ground crews. No life signs, no contact at all. I - I don't know what's going on. Our preliminary scans indicated a - power source of some kind on the planet, that was masked somehow, but manifested itself right before -

The screen goes static. Langley swears profusely and hits the unit. Callenegra pops back on the vid.

CALLENEGRA
Langley!

LANGLEY (desperate)
Here, sir. Captain Daly and the others - are presumed dead - you have to help us, we're stranded out here and there's something - you have to send reinforcements.

CALLENEGRA
Langely, I'm losing you.

LANGLEY
Novakovich! Are you monitoring!

NOVAKOVICH
I'm losing the connection.

LANGELY
Sir - SIR!

But Callenegra is gone.

Langley reaches forward, and with an air of finality, presses a few buttons on the machine. It goes dead.

LANGELY
You get that?

NOVAKOVICH
Yes, sir. The connection was closed on Callenegra's side.

Langley gets to her feet.

LANGLEY
Folks, we have just been abandoned. Can this thing fly?

Jaron enters the shuttle.

JARON
Barely. We can get liftoff. We have enough fuel for a three hour flight minimum burn, one hour maximum.

MAR
Langley.

Langley pauses, looks towards Mar.

MAR
We can't fight the Vai with a shuttle, two rookies, and three rifles.

LANGLEY
It's a chance we have to take.

MAR
An unnecessary chance. They wiped out an entire retrieval team and turned Lee into a walking light source.

LANGLEY (slightly annoyed)
What do you propose we do then?

MAR
Find Dr. Chenei. She's the one who created the first biological weapon.

LANGLEY (extremely skeptical)
On a shuttle's medical kit?

MAR
That and Kaheel.

LANGLEY
Kaheel?

Mar nods quietly.

------------------
The writer's life is not meant to be a happy one. We all accept that going in. -JMS

[This message has been edited by channe (edited December 27, 2001).]
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

Sorry for the delay, everyone. Without further ado.

--

INT. ISHNU - ALIEN CITY - HALLWAY

The above-referenced doctor, captain, and operations officer are flattened against the wall as alien language flickers in their ears - the harsh, striking, inhuman tones of the Vai we've heard before, as well as a light, beautiful machine howling somewhere between vowels and birdsong.

Downey is currently bent over a device on his wrist, doing calculations. Sweat drips on his face, as it does on Daly's and Chenei's. He looks up, and nods in a certain direction.

Daly confirms with a nod of his head. They move forward, cross the hallway, turn a bend, and flatten themselves against the wall once more. There's a sense of heightened urgency, which is added to by the increasing frequency of the alien language echoing through the hallways.

DOWNEY
Human energy signal again. Could be one of Ari's transmitters. Straight ahead, to the right. There should be a door.

DALY
I don't like it. I don't like going in blind.

DOWNEY
Isn't that what we're already doing?

The sound above them changes abruptly - instead of the two-pronged sound, it resembles Krrzkadd's untranslated tones, only short, clipped, and urgent.

CHENEI
I don't like that.

DALY
Doctor?

CHENEI (louder)
It sounds like transmissions we recieved just before the commencement of the Offensive -

DOWNEY
Shut up, Doctor -

CHENEI
We should get out of here.

DALY
Agreed. We'll go forward with the plan.

DOWNEY
We can't.

Daly rounds on Downey.

DALY
We'll go forward. As long as we have a chance.

Downey nods.

The three push off from the wall, following Daly's instructions. Straight ahead, to the right, where they reach a door much like the others. Downey reaches out, begins to fry the mechanism.

DALY
One... two... three!

On the count of three, Daly attempts to kick the door in. Nothing happens.

DOWNEY
Trying again.

Chenei looks up. Shadows have begun to gather at each end of the hallway.

CHENEI (hoarsely)
Captain, we should go.

DALY
I see them.

They grow deeper, darker - and if possible, they take form. They're Vai forms, smaller and far more mobile than Krrzkadd.

CHENEI
It's a trap. We can't go through the door.

DALY
Sure as hell aren't staying here -

The door flies open under Downey's expert ministrations. The three dive through the door, raising their rifles against the opening in defense. They form a triangle - Daly at the center, Chenei and Downey flanking him very closely, their backs to one another.

There's a dank, pressing silence. And then the sound of a human gun being readied.

The Old Man stands behind Daly, a human weapon raised. It's a Titans-issue gun.

OLD MAN
You brought us the Destroyer, Captain. How kind...

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channe@[url="http://cryoterrace.tripod.com"]cryoterrace[/url] | "I wonder," said Frodo, "but I don't know. And that's the way of a real tale."
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

It's now passed 250 messages, so I'll need to close this topic. Please open a new thread to continue.

This would be one topic that would be terrible if lost... so closing it is certainly necessary.



------------------
My candle burns at both its ends,
It will not last the night.
But oh my foes, and oh my friends,
It makes a lovely light.
 
Re: \"Titans\" -Warriors of Virtue

This is one thread that must stay open. Per Antony's instructions, I'm posting in it (and then closing it again) so I can archive it ASAP. The story continues in the thread "Titans II," so go there.

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channe@[url="http://cryoterrace.tripod.com"]cryoterrace[/url] | "I wonder," said Frodo, "but I don't know. And that's the way of a real tale."
 

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