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Old October 1st 03, 13:50   #1
FlipperPA
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B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

Being an American football fan, I often read a column called "Tuesday Morning Quarterback" (or, TMQ as he calls himself) on the ESPN web site. Its absolutely hilarious, very well written, and enjoyable even for non-football fans. This week, the author, Gregg Easterbrook has given Bab-5 props:

See: http://espn.go.com/page2/s/tmq/030930.html

Here's the quote:
Quote:

We're All "Human," With the Exception of Some Linebackers: "Investigators believe the Arizona wildfire was set by humans," declared National Public Radio. So they've ruled out the Klingons as suspects! When wildfires struck British Columbia, NPR declared they were caused "by lightning and by human beings." River otters, apparently, had been cleared.



TMQ trivia: Are these Klingons, Zylons, Taelons or Vorlons?


Saying "human" when you mean "people" is a sci-fi affectation taking over modern discourse. The august Foreign Policy magazine (that's the august magazine, not the August issue) recently headlined an article, "Why Humans Are More Vulnerable Than Ever to Animal-Borne Diseases." The droids remain immune! Scientific American magazine recently noted a study that suggested "humans may not be warming the Earth." So if it's not the humans, is it the Romulans who are driving all those SUVs? Analyzing the Northeast blackout, the New York Times declared that power plants tripped off "before any human being could react." If only the Zylons had acted more quickly!

The Times also noted of the desolate Arctic National Wildlife Refugee, "Few humans go there." But the Borg find it an ideal vacation spot! Washington's Metro transit authority recently announced a biowar-emergency plan to disinfect the parts of subway cars that "come into contact with humans." We don't care if Wookies get sick in our nation's capital? The New York City subway authority unveiled magnetic-strip farecards, replacing tokens sold by "humans in booths." Hey, I've seen some of those New York subway workers, and am not sure they are representatives of genus Homo.


Aliens note: Why do so many names of sci-fi aliens end in "on"? Klingons, Zylons, Taelons, Vorlons and on and on. TMQ always loved the Vorlons, the sinister ancient species of the "Babylon Five" space opera, because their name sounds like the secret ingredient in laundry detergent. Maybe their starcruisers say on the side in bright letters, "Now! With added Vorlon!"

I got a good laugh out of it. ;-)

-Tim
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Old October 1st 03, 19:33   #2
Cerberus
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

Very cool, thanks for sharing

Cerberus
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Old October 2nd 03, 09:50   #3
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

I was there less than a month ago! Not inside the stadium but I drove right by it! I was visiting some relatives and they took me into the city. The first thing that I thought of when I saw that thing was that it looked like a Vree cruiser had crashed into the lake shore!
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Old October 2nd 03, 10:29   #4
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

"Now! With added Vorlon!"

That's definitely going in the sig.
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Old October 2nd 03, 11:41   #5
nathan_forst
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

LOL!

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Old October 2nd 03, 13:34   #6
FlipperPA
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

I'm glad you enjoyed it. He's a really fun writer, worth a weekly read, even if you're not into football. He often makes comments about how sci-fi shows affect the "real world."

I was also in Chicago this summer. That stadium is scary. Soldier Field was one of the all-time classic stadiums, and it really does look like a Vree ship hit the middle of Chicago smack into the stadium. It looks almost like a building in Brasilia... absolutely nuts. Apparently, the folks in Chicago aren't please... they're mad about the renovation (paid for with taxpayer money) that makes everything from tickets to beer to food more expensive in the stadium (they pick up the tab for that too) AND its pretty darn ugly... it doesn't fit with the rest of the architecture of Chicago.

OTOH, it does look an awful lot like a space ship.

-Tim
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Old October 2nd 03, 13:41   #7
StarForBram
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

As a long time resident of the Chicago area, the looks of the renovated Soldier Field is not the problem. The problem is how bad the team that plays in it!

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Old October 2nd 03, 14:58   #8
FlipperPA
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

The Chicago Bears this year do seem to be the equivalent of the Pak'Ma'Ra on B5... then again, I'm in Philly, where our team was *supposed* to be good this year... and we're getting crushed by superior forces more often than the Narn!

The biggest news of our football season so far has been getting that idiot Rush Limbaugh to weigh in on our quarterback... and make himself look really stupid doing so!

-Tim
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Old October 2nd 03, 21:42   #9
HockeyPlayer47
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

Quote:
The problem is how bad the team that plays in it!
Quote:
The biggest news of our football season so far has been getting that idiot Rush Limbaugh to weigh in on our quarterback... and make himself look really stupid doing so!
[Cartman] OH, SERIOSLY YOU GUYS!!! SERIOUSLY!! [Cartman]
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Old October 2nd 03, 22:05   #10
Joseph DeMartino
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Re: B5 mentioned on ESPN.com

Quote:
"Now! With added Vorlon!"
So now we know what the Vorlon ship said when Sheridan took his little "walk"

Regards,

Joe
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